It has come down to this. I think I have internal anger issues. Yesterday morning the fire alarm went off in my apartment complex and I laid there in bed, like an obese American with confetti of fried chicken all over the bed sheets. The alarm went off for about ten minutes and I can hear people opening their front doors. I still didn’t get out of bed.
I’m not depressed, I do have a little bit of anxiety, but I don’t think I have any disorder besides not having shampooed my hair for over 4 months (trust me, you’re not supposed to shampoo your hair everyday. The shampoo industry has got you fooled dude!). I had to wake up anyways for a meeting, but I lost 10 minutes of sleep because of the false alarm. How’d I know it was a false alarm without prior knowledge? Well, some people understand they have gifts that were given to them beyond scientific comprehension and I have spidey senses. “With great power, comes great responsibility.”
I completely object to your blog’s parading of a large child. You incriminate the shampoo industry, but what about the corn industry? As a noted food industry critic says, we’re all “walking tortilla chips with legs.” Soda = HFCS (that’s just straight synthetic sugar to the dome), french fries = cooked in corn oil and corn coating, hamburger = that sad cow was fed on a strictly corn diet.
Let’s interrogate and terrorize those industries worth terrorizing.